And so sorry I kinda just put you on the spot right in the beginning and opened up this can of worms. But I’d like to talk about dirty talk and pull some content actually from my latest book, co authored by Marla Renee Stewart, and that’s The Ultimate Guide to Seduction and Foreplay. ‘Cause we dedicate a big section to verbal seduction and I’ve talked about it many times that I’m very audio person, like the other day I ran into a guy that I went to junior school with. And so I haven’t seen him in, I actually think we went to high school for a bit together as well, but I haven’t seen him in over twenty years. And he said, “oh Jessica O’Reilly.” And I didn’t recognize him at all but then I processed his voice and I was able to remember who he was.
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- “It’s all about telling your partner how much of a turn-on it is for you to know that you are turning them on,” Eros says.
- Dirty talk during lockdown isn’t just for established couples who are suddenly long-distance because they can’t quarantine at home together, though.
- Like that good girl thing is such an interesting thing to me.
- You can start by whispering sweet and kind things; you could then start whispering about all the things that you would love to do to him.
“One of the most important basics is understanding what words you like to describe all the parts of your body, as well as your partner’s,” says Horn. Anatomy is particularly personal, whether your preference is pussy, vulva, penis, cock, dick, or perhaps more euphemistic like “down there” or “inside me.” Marin suggests trying to read either already written erotica or what you wrote down out loud to yourself in the mirror. It’s a great exercise in getting comfortable with the vulnerability of vocalizing your desires from the comfort of your own company. All varieties can find their voice through dirty talk, whether you tend toward the kinky and X-rated or more vanilla and tender. First and foremost, try to get all your preconceived notions about dirty talk — how it’s”supposed” to sound or what you’re “supposed” to say — out of your head.
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Anatomical language is very gendered, so being able to choose what words you prefer to describe your body, and letting your partners know this is how you prefer to be described, can be a wonderful expression of freedom. Communication is at the heart of every sexual connection. At times, you don’t need words to talk dirty to a guy. When you’re making love to your man, show your appreciation with wet gasps and moans. The normative difference between initiating romantic relationships and initiating casual sex is expressed in gender differences. Thus, researchers Katie Adams and Omri Gillath argue that whereas men and women are equally likely to accept offers to go on a date, men are much more likely to accept a sexual offer from a woman than the opposite.
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Expressing our sexual desire is even more problematic as it may indicate an absence of love, and unlike the feeling of love, requires consent and reciprocity (Ben-Ze’ev, 2023; and here). A friend got me this book because she knew my and my husband were trying to get kinkier and try new things. I LOVED the chapter about taking on new personas and attitudes when talking dirty, it opened up a world of possibilities. Perfect gift, loved every minute of it. In general, women have sexual dominance over men.
It’s not the most natural thing in the world, is it? However, you can learn how to talk dirty to a guy and have him in the palm of your hand much easier than you might think. It all comes down to confidence, practice, and a few tips.